Almost one and a half year ago , I lost someone who is very dear to my heart and soul. Life is not same after that tragic incident. All my thoughts were concentrated on that loss. I have asked myself a number of times, ” Did I deserve this?” There is no answer to this question.
Sudden loss of any kind often becomes a traumatic experience. It can give you sleepless nights, anxiety and many health related problems. You can eventually draw yourself into a state where you may lose interest in life and whatever is happening around you. Those were the most scariest moments of my life when I started to feel the same.
Most people say time is a great healer. That may be true in most cases but personally I feel that loss of a loved one creates a permanent scar on your soul. To do justice for the memory of your loved one , do some good deeds in this life so that he or she may be proud of you.
That old black diary
That old black diary remained with me for many years. It was my own private world of loving memories. To another person it just had lists of daily chores to be done, important reminders, names, addresses and telephone numbers but for me it was like reliving a wonderful past.
That diary became a symbol of dedication and integrity for me. It was a reminder for me that in this material world there used to be a soul who cared for others. Whenever my teaching days became too hectic I would get inspiration from that black diary .That diary actually depicted life of an amazing teacher /principal who believed in making positive difference in the lives of students.
That was my father’s diary who served his community for many years as a great teacher and visionary principal of a private school in Pakistan.
I still have that diary with me somewhere in my book shelf but I need to move on. I am thinking of writing my own black diary in comming days.